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4th Of YOU LIE
Every time a public holiday approaches, say on a Friday, it's amazing how many folks at the agency fall ill on Thursday. Did these people all eat at the same shitty restaurant and fall prey to the same food poisoning? Perhaps they all attended the same orgy and are now dealing with the same itchy aftermath? Or maybe, just maybe they're all full of it. Don't get me wrong. Turning a long weekend into a long, long weekend makes complete sense. What doesn't make sense to me are the transparent excuses that follow. Eyes suddenly inflicted with infection. Asses suddenly exploding with diarrhea. Grandmothers suddenly dying. Really? I wonder how these grannies would feel knowing that their grandkids had to kill them off prematurely for an extra day of dry humping in Shelter Island. The obvious irony here is that these "sick" employees know they're lying. We know they're lying. They even know we know they're lying. But for some reason we all go along with it. It's an insult to the rest of us who take great pride in a well crafted lie. Those of us who choose our lies carefully, collaborate with others for consistency, and even map the entire story on a large wall (like in CSI). All I'm saying is we get it. You want an extra day to yourself. There's no crime in that, just come clean or the next time you ask to see my work, you can go looking for it inside my make-believe dog's shit because apparently, he ate it.
Every time a public holiday approaches, say on a Friday, it's amazing how many folks at the agency fall ill on Thursday. Did these people all eat at the same shitty restaurant and fall prey to the same food poisoning? Perhaps they all attended the same orgy and are now dealing with the same itchy aftermath? Or maybe, just maybe they're all full of it. Don't get me wrong. Turning a long weekend into a long, long weekend makes complete sense. What doesn't make sense to me are the transparent excuses that follow. Eyes suddenly inflicted with infection. Asses suddenly exploding with diarrhea. Grandmothers suddenly dying. Really? I wonder how these grannies would feel knowing that their grandkids had to kill them off prematurely for an extra day of dry humping in Shelter Island. The obvious irony here is that these "sick" employees know they're lying. We know they're lying. They even know we know they're lying. But for some reason we all go along with it. It's an insult to the rest of us who take great pride in a well crafted lie. Those of us who choose our lies carefully, collaborate with others for consistency, and even map the entire story on a large wall (like in CSI). All I'm saying is we get it. You want an extra day to yourself. There's no crime in that, just come clean or the next time you ask to see my work, you can go looking for it inside my make-believe dog's shit because apparently, he ate it.
